ShatGPT Pro
The world's most advanced Large Latrine Model. Ask it anything about your data -- it'll give you a straight answer, no straining required.
See it in action
Watch ShatGPT analyze a live data pipeline in real-time.
What makes ShatGPT different
Large Latrine Model (LLM)
Built on 420 billion parameters trained on the world's largest corpus of data movement patterns. It understands your crap better than you do.
Natural Language Queries
Ask questions in plain English. 'Why is my pipeline backed up?' gets you a real answer, not a stack trace.
Predictive Obstruction Detection
ShatGPT sees blockages before they happen. Like a colonoscopy for your data infrastructure, but way less uncomfortable.
Auto-Generated Reports
Turns raw data dumps into executive-ready summaries. Your board gets the highlights, you skip the grunting.
Multi-Modal Analysis
Feed it CSVs, JSONs, images, PDFs -- even handwritten notes from that one engineer. It digests everything.
Context-Aware Humor
Optional 'Comedy Mode' adds tasteful poop jokes to your reports. Surprisingly popular with C-suite.
Performance benchmarks
Ready to talk sh*t?
Start a conversation with ShatGPT and see what comes out.